Twenty Ways Your Workout Has Grown Up

Just like our kids, our workouts grow up, and for better or worse, usually our fitness routines are not what they were before children.

I find what used to be a casual pastime, has become a necessity for health of my body and mind. As a parent, I find working out to be a luxury, with time a precious commodity. How has your workout changed since becoming a parent?

1. You have a favorite pair of yoga pants, but now it is based on comfort, not brand name (never mind that they are stained with formula).

2. You have your gym’s fitness class schedule memorized because you can only make the Circuit Workout class after you drop off your preschooler, but before the baby’s morning nap.

3. You used to workout as damage control before a night of partying, now you exercise for injury prevention.

4. A weekend workout no longer starts whenever you roll out of bed; you are up with the sun before a day of soccer tournaments and birthday parties begin.

5. You plan your home spin workout around HGTV, not MTV.

6. You no longer listen to techno when you workout; you repeatedly listen to Beyonce’s “All the Single Ladies” because some days, you almost wish you still were.

7. “A day off” doesn’t mean calling in sick to work; it means you are so tired from round- the-clock feedings, you simply cannot drag yourself out of bed for your morning gym session.

8. You drop the kids off in the gym daycare and seriously contemplate skipping spin class and taking a nap in the car instead.

9. With your mature metabolism, no amount of exercise is going to burn off that basket of fries you ate last night.

10. You used to bring Gatorade into the gym with you; now you carry coffee from one machine to the next.

11. You no longer check out guys at the gym, but you scrutinize all of the women’s backsides and compare them to your own.

12. These days, twenty minutes of cardio is about all you can squeeze in, and you round that up to thirty minutes of exercise.

13. You chose your gym based on the quality of childcare they provide, not the type of machines offered, or the ratio of men to women.

14. You don’t wear compression socks for running performance; you wear them for varicose veins damage control.

15. There’s no need to belong to 24 Hour Fitness, because you’re lucky if you can get into the gym between the hours of 2 and 4 pm.

16. Your designer gym bag has been replaced with a diaper bag, stuffed with bottles, pacifiers, wipes, bibs, diapers, baby’s change of clothes, snacks for your toddler, infant ibuprofen, teething rings, oh, and a towel for your workout.

17. You used to meet a girlfriend for a run around the bay to catch up on gossip about people in the office; now you meet her on the treadmill to gossip about people in playgroup.

18. Now that you are a mother, you wonder if men still check you out when you run by them on the road.

19. After three kids, you feel your chest move when you swim laps in the pool, and they have a stroke all their own.

20. Many days you really want to blow off tomorrow’s workout, but when you kiss your sleeping kids goodnight, somehow you manage to muster up the energy and courage to do it all again the next day.

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